Lately I've been I've been...

Because lately, my life really did seem like it was on the precipice of being a

dream. There were days I thought I’d wake up and discover that

recent events in my life hadn’t actually happened. Surely I must be a princess

in an enchanted sleep. Any day now, this dream—no, nightmare—

would end, and I’d get my prince and happy ending.

But there was no happy ending to be found, at least not in the foreseeable future.

- The Winners' Curse

Sigh, one of those days where I look into my future and deeehhh deeehhhh, looking into a pool of nothingness and that nothingness is creeping all over me.. gross...

& then there are conflicts and misunderstandings and everything! I guess the saying that what goes up must come down is really true to a certain extent. Be afraid when everything is too perfect and happiness is blooming in your face under the sunshine, because the storm is always just a stone away and is too damn near for you to be forgetting your umbrella. (Duh and I am obviously one of those that doesn't bring my raincoat out.) Getting drenched in the real rain is definitely different from the emotional storm that you have to face! The drama effect in your mind sends a whirlpool of thoughts to you and torture you everyday.... I guess that's how seasick feels like...

The churning in your stomach and dizzy spells you get, you just feel like throwing them all out! Sometimes, it makes you feel better, but other times, it just gets worse.

PS: 传导桥头自然直~ (Unless the boat isn't going forward?)

The Winner's Curse

Night had truly fallen. Arin wondered if she would lift her eyes, but wasn’t worried he would be seen in the garden’s shadows.

He knew the law of such things: people in brightly lit places cannot see into the dark.

- The Winner's Curse

Nice intro from Karen!!! Its a series that I will be looking forward to! And it is a miracle that I am into this war related book because whenever it comes to war, I am usually very reluctant to immerse myself into it. Yeah, it contains romance and slavery too but this book is really nice!!!

How much have we sacrifice just for own pride and ego?

Don't we all lose something more important when we put too much emphasis on or image?

To apologise, when you are in the wrong,

to say your gratitude, when you are thankful,

is that really so hard?

In this case, its a harsher. Just because you want to win, you sacrifice much more men to conquer that territory? Even though it is not worth it any longer, you still want your pride back. 

Humans are such dum dum di dummmm~ 

不哭了 - No more tears

BY2 - 不哭了

作词：吴剑泓 / Mr Mars / 王帅 / 吴振豪
作曲：吴振豪

听着听着又哭了
朋友口中听说你和她的

窗外天空失眠了
星星还孤单的闪着

原来我最执着的
竟是你从来都不在乎的
放开手天突然亮了

不哭了 不哭了
现在我一个人不哭了
看着你最爱看的电影哼着你的歌

不苦了 不苦了
何必为不值得而哭呢
谢谢你 让我明白失去你 才会快乐

哭过的人才会懂爱没有满分
微笑的人总会有幸福的可能

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失恋的人不要哭，单恋的人更不要哭
他不懂你，可是其实，没有人真的懂另一个人
不要太在意，没有人是真的一辈子能让你依靠的
笑一笑，没什么事请过不了

"I can live alone, if self-respected, and circumstances require me so to do. I need not sell my soul to buy bliss. I have an inward treasure born with me, which can keep me alive if all extraneous delights should be with held, or offered only at a price I cannot afford to give." Jane Eyre 

Too caught up in my own personal drama

But I was too caught up in my own personal drama to say a word. I felt like someone had ripped my heart out and tossed it across the other side of the room. There was a burning, agonizing pain in my chest, and I had no idea how it could ever be filled. It was one thing to accept that I couldn\'t have Dimitri. It was something entirely different to realize someone else could.

I didn\'t say anything else to her because my speech capabilities no longer existed. Fury glinted in her eyes,

and her lips flattened out into that tight expression of displeasure she so often wore. Without another word, she turned around and left, slamming the door behind her. That door slam was something I would have done too, actually. I guess we really did share some genes.

But I forgot about her almost immediately. I just kept sitting there and thinking. Thinking and imagining.

I spent the rest of the day doing little more than that. I skipped dinner. I shed a few tears. But mostly, I just sat on my bed thinking and growing more and more depressed.

- Vampire Academy 

Something more intellectual from the bimbo series. Finished all 6 books last month but don't have the time to really give a review about the series. Partly, also because I don't want to be giving a review. This series made me hate the main character LOL... And I think that readers are suppose to like the main lead.. With her bimbotic actions and ridiculous relationship/life decision, I really cannot bring myself to like her.. Nevertheless, it is a good series to my boring time.. HA HA HA (And yes, I am also typing this during my very efficient working hours.) 

Phuket (110514 - 140514)

Phuket, Thailand Trip 2014

I am hyped up now after coffee and a day of office work.
I want to go for a walk but my phone no batt. zzz.

Best days of my life?
I have many many many best days in my life, but this is definitely a trip that I will remember as long as I don't lose my memory or become senile. There might be a better trip in the future but that future is not near definitely. I will bring this memory to the next phase of my life. I planned hard for this trip (or maybe cus I was too bored). Ok whatever, I did quite a bit of research and taadaaa it was indeed well planned.. Except that I couldn't pay by debit card for the accommodation?! (Lucky I could withdraw money heheh) and we were too tired for clubbing and I think some of the guys were disappointed cuz we don't have ATV, water rafting etc.

DAY 1 // SET OFF, ARRIVAL, WEEKEND MKT

Airport shot, look at the progression of Qinhe taking #selfies / #wefies :D

Yuzheng so happy playing with his DQ as we explore around our villa area and hunt for some food!

JP & his signature twist!! 

TUK TUK to the weekend market to satisfy llama's shopping craves. hahahha. Tuktuk rides are the best and the combo of Meitong & Qinhe taking wefies is goooooodd! They are good partners! ehehheh! I think we had a lot of fun bargaining with those tuktuk uncles and travelling in them! These tuktuks are so different from the ones i took in bkk! Bkk's ones so small, 4 person, 1 will have to sit on the floor! Over here it fits us 8 just fine!! COOOOOOLZ & they're super cute on the outside too! 

DAY 2 // ISLAND TOUR & DRINKING SESSION

We can't get enough of group photos! Yes, I got the waterproof casing for my phone heheheheh! Was doubting its usefulness at the start but wow its amazing.. Although sometimes it made me feel that I lost my phone when it is floating about in the water :( BAD FEELING BAD BAD FEELING! Did not snorkel much, more of throwing bread near my friends so that the fishes keep swimming around them hehehehehhe! I hope some of them have brand new experience for snorkelling! (I seriously want to snorkel somewhere else other than Thailand cuz the fishies here all the sameeeee!) Also, because Phuket was not very near most of the islands, we spent a lot of time on the deck of the express boat, it was rather pleasant I would say? We all successfully fell asleep on top of the boat and get ourselves sun tanned hahaha! I was awaken by a gush of heat wave! LOL, the Sun in Phuket, NO JOKE NO KIDDING MAN!!!

Back to Villa, commencement of drinking session! Just what the….. zzz.. I really cannot drink.. I probably puked like 4-5 times that night.. to the point my stomach felt really empty and all that came out was transparent vodka… puiiiiii…. I had fun watching them get drunk though! hahaha! When you can't enjoy drinking yourself, you have got to learn how to enjoy watching others drink! Yuzheng was hilarious! kept on slapping kevin! and they were like high~~! To the point qinhe walked around in his boxers -_- and jingpeng lock meitong and me out of our own room! Pranks like drawing and putting toothpaste on drunkards never felt better! (poor yuzheng was the saddest victim) HAHAHA! YAY!

DAY 3 // KATA BEACH

All the beach pictures, #nofilter already so pretty muahahahhaha!!!!!! :D

 

SO SO FUCKING PERFECT DAY! (& On this day we realise we have to home bound the next day! Damn sad but I am the 2nd last day was fucking perfect) Would like to say, I AM GLAD WE GAVE UP ATV, water rafting, elephant riding for KATA BEACH! It is a PARADISEEE!~~ *Insert bog's almost paradiseeeeee* It was an OTOT (Own Time Own Target) Day… cuz we drank last night and all… we set off to kata beach at 12pm! A bit too late cuz we spent some time shopping at patong LOL

Look at the 50 shades of BLUE (MY FAVOURITE COLOUR) from the ocean to the sky, it was amazing, awesome, fabulous, FANTASTICAAAA!!!! :D:D:D:D hahaha, I am feeling happy just thinking about it… Please Sentosa can just go aside! Chey!

This beach is not crowded, but I see the potential of it being overwhelmed in the next few years. So I guess, I am glad to be here before it gets overcrowded? heheh, hopefully the peacefulness remains though! The waves was too strong that day! >_< But so good for Jetski-ing! Jet ski~!!!! Haven't tried it for a long time since I was young LOL! Yuzheng & me daebakkkkkkkk!!!!!! AWESOME PARTNER HAHAHA ALTHOUGH WE almost made each other fly out of the ski! Heheh, cooooolz! Half of them went parasailing (did not go cuz I felt that it was not exciting enough for me for the price! hahaha! $40 SGD leh! If I pay that price, I want to parasail myself, not with some monkey man behind me!!) Jet ski was expensive too like $30SGD for 30 minutes.. But it was all worth it, I HAD SO MUCH FUN handling/ being the passenger of the jet ski! WOOTS WOOTS!!!! 

And we played some double dodge ball games that made me run and spin around like dog with a volley ball that we bought over there at SGD10! It is really sad that we couldn't bring the ball back cis we can't inflate it at the airport. SIGH! Wasted… Our volleyball in SG, sitting at the corner of my room currently, has no air, and is going to breakdown any moment bleahhhhh~! 

By 6pm we were all worn out physically!!! Like Jiahao became a lobster!!!!!! Red red lobster!!! Sunburnt like crazy! The sun no mercy! And the beach is too fun not to be enjoying it!!! I just turn chao da… thats all.. sigh.. and minor sunburns…. LIKE MINOR! SO I CANNOT REVERT TO MY ORIGINAL SHADE ANYMORE!!!! Cryy~

And we finally had our seafood dinner that day! The taste i normal but its cheap so OK!!!

DAY 4 // SHOPPING & HOME-BOUND *SOBS*

Last day, not very well planned, free and easy? We should be going to Thai massage or something although I seriously cannot take massages! LOL, we ended up in a gigantic shopping mall playing arcade and going to the 4D theatre. (Forgot the name of the shopping mall though, not thai enough to remember it.) Nevertheless, it was a relaxing and fun day for us to close our minds and prepare to return to reality. 

I had a really really sad lunch cuz our soup was spoilt by the self proclaim chef ong! >:( Ok, cannot blame him, I don't even know how to cook..anyway the buffet there is really really cheap.

Lastly, we almost miss our flight back to Singapore but haha so much for wanting to continue staying there!

---------------------------------------------

I love each and every single of my company in this trip! So glad that Meitong is willing to join and mingle with my crazy, guailan, fan4jian4 friends and I know she definitely enjoyed the trip too! Although there were some awkward situations, I guess yolo Meitong and my very friendly friends made it through good enough! I am thankful that my friends opened their shy heart to accept Meitong and make friends with her, but I think Meitong made it really easy for them too. hahahha. My qt pie, I am going to miss you a lot a lot! xoxo

On another hand, super duper understanding Sam was like damn great. She totally understand me, no wonder we are still friends after 9 long years. Had a htht with Sam before the trip cuz I was worried that I would spend more time trying to get tong to open up to the guys, Sam was really cool with it and she really talk and interact with tong a lot too. Their character is really really different but I guess cool Sam always have ways to subdue those that are different from her. (Yes, She and me practically never like the same thing.) And she is almost never cheesy, so when she is cheesy and do touching stuffs for me, I am always in awe! Thanks, I am touched, but I am not paying you $5!!!! >_<

I've been to so many trips and for the most of them, it was the place that made them unbelievably beautiful and unforgettable, however, for this trip, not only is the scenery and activities fabulous, my company that trusted me so much, made everything more than perfect. I am not the best planner in the world, I would make this a 5d4n trip if I knew the beach was going to be so taxing on us, and we had to give up ATV, white water rafting, etc. However, not once did they blame me when something goes wrong, I am truly happy! (: 

Note: I would love to be able to go on a well-planned trip again with them... (Excluding genting & jb) But that is base on many other factors, like friendship, time, distance, and money, etc. Looking at the worst scenario, Phuket trip might be my last trip with this group of good friends~ khob khoon ka to my friends and lovely Thailand! :D 

PS: May peace be with Thailand~